It’s not mean to offer sincere constructive feedback. To the contrary, blowing smoke up the orifices of others is probably more cruel than giving an honest take on what they could and should have done differently. How kind is it to contribute to someone’s impression they are on top of things or doing a good job when the opposite is true? Are we to smile, say great job and then avoid the person down the line because it’s just easier that way? Would a person rather go through life with people secretly biting their lips and rolling their eyes over them than hear they may have come up short in some way?
In no way do I support people with the habit of delivering criticism full of acid and absent any objectivity. When someone takes the time to tell you you’ve missed the mark in a nice way and with supportive commentary mixed in, that person should be thanked. They are more your friend than most people walking this planet.
Okay I am so dang curious about what is going on.
If it weren’t such a ridiculously long story, I’d tell it. Suffice it to say a simple situation turned into something big because people can’t admit when they are wrong and have to get all “why are you being so mean” when you tell them your true take on how they handled something.